Codependent Relationships Dynamics - Come Here, Go Away
Codependent Relationships Dynamics - Come Here, Go Away
“As long as we haven’t healed our childhood wounds then there are a lot more than two people involved in our relationships. There may only be two people in the room - but the room is also full of the ghosts of all of our past emotional wounds.” “What is normal and natural in romantic relationships in this society is for a person whose primary fear is abandonment to get involved with someone whose primary fear is being smothered/losing self. The person with abandonment fears reacts to shows of independence on the part of the other as if the other were abandoning them. That causes them to become more needy and clinging - which causes the other person to pull away - which causes the first person to cling more - which causes the other to pull away more.” “It is very boring and incredibly painful to keep repeating dysfunctional relationship patterns. The way to stop repeating those patterns is to start healing the wounds that we suffered in childhood.”
This is the fourth in a series of articles by codependency therapist/Spiritual teacher about the ways in which romantic relationships in our society are set up to be dysfunctional.
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Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls by Robert Burney is copyright 1995. Material on Joy2MeU web site (except where otherwise noted) is copyright 1996 thru 2015 by Robert Burney POBox 98 Fallbrook CA 92088.
This series of articles was originally published online on the Inner Child/Codependency Recovery page that I used to edit for Suite101.com Directory - although bits and pieces of the articles have been part of articles and web pages published previously.
Originally published at https://joy2meu.com/codependent4.htm